Eric’s a failure. Steven’s a psycho. Jay’s a cheater. Colt’s a weirdo. Jonathan’s a liar. Anddd Kalani loves cheese doodles. There’s your cheat sheet for this week’s episode of 90 Day Fiancé.
Eric & Leida:
Leida’s family is heading back to Indonesia after wearing out their welcome, so they all go back to New York to say goodbye. Eric lies and says “everything will be good” and you can see Leida’s father grimace as he shakes Eric’s hand. Leida’s sister is beyond disappointed in Leida’s decision to stay in the US with Eric; so therefore, she is not coming to say goodbye to her sister. Talk about taking a stand! Leida’s father wants to be sure that Eric is the right man for his daughter and even tells the producers that he may not come back for the wedding. Leida explains that “part of me just wants to go” with her family on the plane back, but against her better judgment, she hops in the car with Eric and her son, and off they go to Wisconsin.
Back at the hell-hole, I mean apartment, in Wisconsin, Leida is doing her best to clean up the grossness. She is sad her family has gone back to Indonesia and is unhappy in Eric’s dirty little apartment. Leida is pleased to know that Eric has been looking at houses, “big houses,” but is bummed that her son has to “temporarily” stay in the room with her and Eric. Eric explains that he has to make the best of the place, that he shares with his daughter, Tasha, and Leida is annoyed, as usual. Eric is fearful about Leida meeting Tasha for the first time, especially because Tasha left the apartment a pig sty. Is anyone else worried about Eric’s excessive sweat during this segment???? I know he’s nervous about his fiancé and daughter meeting, but that’s a little much, Eric.
Tasha eventually enters the apartment and comments, “ooo, it’s nice in here.” That’s because Leida cleaned it! Leida wastes no time and lets Tasha know she “wasn’t comfortable” when she got here. Tasha found Leida “rude,” but she stuck around to give Leida a chance to warm up. Tasha apologizes and explains that the apartment “wasn’t trashed.” She further insinuates that the apartment is now a lot cleaner than she is used to and Leida states, “I want you to move out. I don’t think we can work it out.” Tasha doesn’t skip a beat and says, “As far as I know, your name is not on the lease, so you can’t kick me out.” Touché. Eric tries to make things better by offering to take Tasha around to “those little budget motels” (Yes, those filled with hookers, drug dealers, and all that other good stuff!) until she can find a new place to live. Eric overshares and tells Leida that he has taken over all of the bills for the apartment. Leida is p*ssed and demands to know “every details.” She threatens Eric and tells him, “if I hear something you’re gonna be in big trouble.”
Colt & Larissa:
With only 59 days to wed, the newly engaged couple + Deb, Colt’s mom, pile in the family whip and head out for some Brazilian food to celebrate the proposal. Larissa explains, “I don’t like the food of Debbie. It’s like a hospital food.” She’s gonna show them the way of the land at the Brazilian steakhouse this evening. The waiter begins speaking Portuguese to Larissa and Colt sits awkwardly while he watches them flirt. The trio enjoys various meats and Larissa begins to bring up wedding planning. Colt isn’t sure of the amount of guests that will be attending the wedding, but Larissa makes it clear that her family will not be coming in for the celebration. Larissa pushes Colt-e HARD to have the wedding at the Brazilian restaurant, but he only retorts, “We can sit down and talk about it.” Deb isn’t sure if Larissa is the “right one” for Colt, but I hate to let Debbie know, Colt doesn’t have THAT many options… Colt shares that he is 97% sure that he wants to marry Larissa, and this shocks her completely. Time’s ticking for this couple, so they better get on the same page.
Colt is playing catch up trying to win Larissa back after his 97% comment. Therefore, he has found a potential wedding venue for their big day and that seems to smooth over any left-over anger Larissa may be feeling. The couple goes the restaurant to check out the reception dining area and, according to Larissa, Colt gets rather comfortable with the hostess. As the hostess walks them through the area, Larissa becomes aggravated by Colt-e, as he likes to “look good” and “talk a lot with women.” Larissa tells Colt to stop giving compliments to other women and warns him to stop “acting like an attention whore.” She is annoyed with his behavior and tells him to behave like a man. Colt-e apologizes just as the cake tasting begins, but Larissa continues to make life difficult. The cake is not chocolate, the flirting is non-stop, and Larissa needs proof that Colt-e is really serious about marriage, otherwise, she says “bye bye.”
Steven & Olga:
Hopefully, Steven has calmed down in a big way after his behavior last episode. Steven, Olga, and baby ___ are leaving the hospital today, but I fear for Olga and the baby. Once they get outside, Steven barks orders at Olga. Olga blames his outbursts on being “tired,” but when they begin their journey “home,” Olga looks like she wants to dive out of the moving car. Steven begins by shrieking, “you’re not gonna tell me to stop touching my son” and lays into her for absolutely no reason. Olga seems confused by the way Steven is speaking to her and she worries that there will be a “real problem.” I mean, any guy that yells, pushes, and shouts orders at a woman is a danger to everyone. The worst part is, Steven KNOWS he is being a d-bag to Olga. He KNOWS he has to calm down and be nicer, yet he still isn’t fixing his attitude and behavior.
Now that everyone is back at the apartment, Steven confides that “having a baby is way harder and we’ve just been fighting all morning.” Steven is fearful that if Olga moves to the US, the fighting is not gonna stop. Olga hopes for a more patient Steven, but is worried that Steven “can’t control himself” when he wants to fight. Steven is realizing how tough it is to work on his relationship with Olga while raising a baby. He’s on double-duty.
Ashley & Jay:
Jay has been in America for two months now “and things aren’t going as well” as Jay hoped. He is bored. He is not having fun. And he is feeling uncomfortable “as a young foreigner and black man.” Jay has been playing video games since the morning and Ashley explains that Jay “seems annoyed like 24/7 the past couple of days.” Ashley is getting ignored by Jay and can tell that something is up because he has been paying zero attention to her lately. Almost on cue, Jay’s phone bings with a text and then, Ashley begins psycho girlfriend 101. She questions who is texting Jay, is it a boy or a girl, and then when she finds out it’s a girl, she loses it. Ashley is clearly very insecure in her relationship with Jay, and Jay doesn’t appear to care very much.
To solidify the fact that these two have a MATURE relationship (insert eye roll here), we learn that they go through each other’s phones on the reg. What are they, 15?? Jay states that he “feels like a prisoner or something” and Ashley is unsure that there is enough trust to make this relationship survive.
The awkwardness between these two continues and Ashley hopes for “better communication.” I am DYING to know what red concoction is in Ashley’s martini glass during this dinner conversation. Clearly it is not helping to relax her, particularly when Jay calls Ashley crazy and spiteful. Jay just wants “space and time,” but that translates to leave me alone, Ashley. Jay sucks down a Capri Sun and gets hollered at for not letting Ashley know he is leaving the house. Jay states, “You know like, I’m not thirteen. I’m not your kid.” Ashley is concerned, as they are halfway through the 90 days and she is feeling pretty lousy about their relationship.
Kalani & Asuelo:
Over in Utah, Kalani and Asuelo are still slowly moving into Kalani’s parents’ second home. Because Kalani’s mom is watching baby Oliver, Kalani, Asuelo, and Kalani’s brother, Nick, head out to the park…………to teach Asuelo how to RIDE A BIKE. Poor Asuelo never learned and Kalani is using this learning moment as entertainment. Asuelo looks like an over-sized 5 year old teetering and falling over on his mountain bike. Surprisingly, Asuelo learns how to ride rather quickly, despite his hurt “boohole.”
Kalani sends Asuelo “off to play” so she can talk to Nick about her wedding with Asuelo. She states that she has planned “literally nothing” because she is feeling pressure. Kalani states that she is not really sure if she wants to marry Asuelo because “he has done some weird things with the baby that” she “wouldn’t really approve of.” She further states, “I don’t trust him with the baby” and that Asuelo “feels like a child to me.” Ouch. Give him a chance. Clearly he is a fast learner. I mean, does she NOT SEE him biking all over the park!? Kalani asks Nick to watch Asuelo watch Oliver and “be there for safety reasons.” That seems kinda dirty to me. Kalani’s brother seems to think that Kalani shouldn’t feel like she has to marry Asuelo out of “obligation.”
Today’s the big day: The spy mission: Operation Nick watches Asuelo watch Oliver. The three dudes head out and Nick asks Asuelo his favorite thing about being Oliver’s dad. Asuelo responds that “his wife is white and the baby lives in America.” Strike one. Nick drives them all to a baby clothing store and watches Asuelo like a hawk as Asuelo picks out pajamas for Oliver. Nick is like a hover-mom, eyeing Asuelo’s every move and correcting everything. I will say that when Asuelo carries Oliver on his shoulders, I was holding my breath, as Oliver can barely hold his head up on his own. Asuelo doesn’t wanna hear about safety tips from Nick and Nick believes that “it’s a kid raising a kid” when Asuelo is left alone with Oliver. Poor Asuelo: “After today, I hope Kalani will trust me forever with my son Oliver.”
Post shopping trip, Kalani oos and ahs over Oliver’s new clothes. Asuelo tells Kalani that “her brother’s being weird and trying to correct what he was doing.” Kalani shares that the day was really a spy mission because Asuelo is always “wrong.” Asuelo feels concerned about his relationship with Kalani and believes that Nick should mind his own business. Kalani doesn’t think marriage is in the future for her and Asuelo, as the dangerous things he does with Oliver is worrying her.
Jonathan & Fernanda:
The couple is visiting Jonathan’s family in Chicago. This is the first time Fernanda is meeting Jonathan’s mom and the rest of his family. I have a feeling this is gonna be an awkward exchange, particularly because Jonathan’s “family found out I was engaged on Facebook newsfeed.” Tonight, they are going to meet Jonathan’s baby sister, Jackie, who is actually OLDER than Fernanda. Well, now that you put it that way, it sounds weird. Jackie embraces Fernanda warmly and Fernanda plops down on Jonathan’s lap (despite there being plenty of seats) to get to know Jackie better. Jonathan tries to explain how boring Fernanda’s life in Lumberton is and Jackie states that she couldn’t imagine being in Fernanda’s shoes. And by shoes, she means marrying at 19. Jackie blurts out that a month before she found out about Jonathan’s engagement on Facebook, Jonathan made it clear that he was planning to never get married. Jackie thinks this whole situation is insane, but Fernanda wants to be sure that everyone in Jonathan’s family is on board for their relationship.
While touring Chicago, Fernanda seems happy and less pressured after meeting Jonathan’s sister, Jackie. Later that day, the duo prep for the big meeting. Jonathan’s mother is coming over to meet Fernanda for the first time and when that doorbell rings, I can almost feel Fernanda’s anxiety. It’s cute that Jonathan’s mom brought over a bottle of wine considering that Fernanda can’t even legally drink. #19. Jonathan’s mom thinks her son may be “going through something” and she eyes Fernanda hard. The conversation is a bit strange when his mom asks him why he is wearing a wedding ring. Jonathan tells his mom that he needed to talk to her before they started their wedding planning and his mom states that Fernanda is younger than her younger child. I mean, again, think about that. Fernanda is a total sweetie, but she is SO young and Jonathan is SO much older and his mom is SO weirded out by their relationship that it seems like nothing but red flags flying high.
Jonathan does his best to sell Fernanda to his mother and he feels so bad that he “didn’t protect and defend her.” His mom says, “I hope you don’t think I’m being too harsh” and Jonathan asks his mother, who has been married multiple times, for some advice. She says to “hold off” on the wedding, but Jonathan’s not hearing any of it. He asks his mother to go with Fernanda as she shops for her wedding dress with HIS credit card and she declines, as she has to “think about it.” Ouch. Fernanda bravely accepts that response, but knows that she will never feel like part of Jonathan’s family.