This week, we are headed to the Hamptons with the Real Housewives of New York City. Will Eboni survive the hazing that Leah claims she was subjected to and will the other ladies want her fired as well?
Eboni invites Leah over to her place while wearing a ginormous fuchsia bow tacked onto her top. She says it is for Eboni, who was a pageant queen. No, Leah, just no, your fashion so far isn’t working for you at all. Eboni and Leah are basically going to talk smack about this raucous group of Housewives.
Eboni lets us know what caused the breakup of her previous relationship. Her guy chose his family over her during COVID and he would have lost his kids if he stayed with her during the pandemic. I thought his kids were grown-ups? Why doesn’t she sleep in her Tribeca place? Who cares if he leased it?
Eboni gives her take on the ladies — specifically Lucille and Ethel. Sonja sized her up and Ramona acted all chummy, which came across as insincere. Eboni doesn’t fool with this many white women, so this is a real learning process in human behavior for her.
Leah missed Burning Man and she wants to incorporate this into the Hamptons trip. She wants to have a dinner event and a chance to get dressed up crazy. It is just another normal day for Miss Leah.
Sonja has her healer Aleta (WOW! She has had some work done!) over to help her with her bad energy. She is going to “chakra” it out of her. Sonja needs to do more for herself other than cosmetic procedures. She has her whole identity wrapped up in the Morgan estate and the precious Morgan letters!
Sonja is reliving her divorce. She wishes she had stuck it out for Quincy. This lady was using a crystal dildo, cymbals, and a wind chime? Umm, okay. The dildo is perfect for Sonja, but is she going to decorate her outdoor garden too? Side note: I hate when she refers to her daughter as the “kid.”
Leah is chatting with her daughter Kier. She won’t even show the outfit she is going to wear. I can imagine how mortifying it would be for a young girl to have a mom who dresses like Leah.
Ramona hired a hospitality director named MICHELLE to prevent vibrators from ending up in the chicken dish. She needs to get her name correct, though. Ramona keeps calling the poor woman Diana, not Michelle. I hope Michelle is getting paid big bucks to work for Ramona for a couple of hours per day. She deserves combat pay to cater to this obnoxious woman.
Ramona has her Burning Man-themed costume and is claiming she actually likes Leah
and her Bravo check. Leah now claims that Ramona and Sonja wanted her fired.
Leah shares with Eboni that her grandma is very ill. She told her grandma that she is going away this weekend. Leah thinks that they are in a good place even if she was to pass over the weekend. Very sad.
Ramona keeps getting Michelle’s name wrong. She then shows signs AGAIN of her “foot in mouth disease” by telling Eboni and Leah she always gets the “help’s” names wrong. Eboni has no idea the reputation Ms. Singer has with anyone who waits on her or hosts her at their home. Eboni thinks calling someone the help is derogatory and demeaning. Me too.
Ramona mentions that she invited Heather this weekend. Leah is surprised that Luann likes Heather after she discussed Luann’s drug use. Wow, our site gets a plug! Ramona got this Google alert, which she thinks is an exclusive thing to just her to let her know about it. Leah then decides to mention she invited Elyse and her sister. JUST KIDDING! Ramona did keep her composure for once.
Luann and Sonja are driving together to the Hamptons. I would rather drive over with these two instead of being stuck in a car with Leah. It would be more entertaining to listen to Sonja ramble on about Diddy’s yacht and John-John and to then have Luann break out into cabaret mode. Sonja is not sure if she wants to immerse herself with these ladies. She is better off wandering off into the desert since she ends up looking more fit and refreshed.
Ramona lets whoever arrives first choose their room. Leah is getting first dibs. Eboni tries to ask Ramona questions but she acts like she didn’t hear her. Ramona claims she has an inner ear infection. Eboni thinks she is listening impaired. Yep, that is accurate. Ramona’s dog Coco has peed on the floor. I wouldn’t walk barefoot on her floors since it seems there is always pee and poop from her dog #lackofpottytraining.
Luann and Sonja arrive and they are happy to see there is still a nice spread of food for them. She is also relieved that she isn’t being relegated to the “lower-level.” Luann scored the penthouse suite on this trip after 15 years. No one puts the countess in the basement anymore!
Ramona and Sonja decide to check the pool heater. It was supposed to be set at 95. Ramona, you don’t set a pool heater to the temperature a hot tub would be. Sonja thinks banging on it will make it work. She then decides to flip the breaker, and voila, it works.
Ramona is wearing sparkly pasties with a sheer top and sparkly skirt. Naturally, Sonja is feeling her up and grabbing her boobs. Even their dogs are into each other and are actually humping each other watching this scene play out. Sonja is basically wearing lingerie with a fur collar and a hat that looks like it was ripped off a scarecrow in a cornfield. Who would have thought that Ramona would have dressed sluttier than Leah?
Leah is doing Mad Max meets Coyote Ugly. Who knew you could wear chaps on both your legs and arms? I honestly was expecting her to wear a*s-less chaps to provoke Ramona. Eboni looks beautiful in her leather blinged-out ensemble.
Luann is wearing a bikini top and macramé cover-up over leggings? It is actually her normal attire and she didn’t forget her statement necklaces. She isn’t drinking booze but has her faux-rosé so she is good.
Ramona/Bravo/Leah really went all out with the theme. I am unsure who gets credit for this design, but it looks fabulous with the tents, fire-pits, and performers. The pool has gotten so hot that is fogging up the backyard, so I guess it was a good idea to turn up the heat!
Devi, the healer, is going to be doing a sound bath. Ramona is perplexed over what a healer does. Leah tries to explain it is more about a feeling. Ramona, the apologizer, keeps interrupting the healer. Leah tells Ramona to not intellectualize it. Bahahaha, Ramona having rational thoughts or thinking logically? Leah, you don’t have to worry about that happening.
Devi goes around to the ladies and has them share what is troubling them. Leah wants her family to have peace with whatever happens with her grandma. She is the matriarch of the family and adores her. Eboni is concerned about losing her grandmother and how it will affect her mom. She feels like she is missing out on family and wants her partner to be part of her family. Eboni only has her mom and grandma that she views as her blood relatives. Luann tries to rub her back and comfort Eboni but gets raked over by her spikes.
Luann mentions that she wants the spirits to show her the way. Ramona wants to focus on her real friends. Luann isn’t buying Ramona focusing on her ”50 really-close friends.” Me either, who can have meaningful relationships with 50 people?
Sonja wants to be a better friend and learn to trust them with her feelings. She wants to check out and disappear. I am sorry, that sounds really sad, and then she goes into something off the chain. Sonja then mentions checking into a nursing home, but she is concerned about the high rate of STDs.
Devi then has them do Reiki. She has them inhaling and exhaling and then releasing the bad energy. Leah starts screaming and crying. She feels better now that she has released some of her demons negative energy. Ramona decides to join in the screaming. She feels like her mind got relaxed when her crazy thoughts got scared sh*tless and escaped out when she started screaming.
Eboni joins this crazy group in the pool, but she isn’t getting white girl wasted. She isn’t at the point where she is going to compromise her scruples. Leah, of course, strips down and dives in topless. She loses a nipple cover and Luann hysterically thinks there is mozzarella floating in the pool. Ramona tries to climb onto her swan and looks absolutely ridiculous. Eboni claims her Irishness is starting to come out and she is going to do the Irish goodbye. We now have characters on stilts with acrobats and Eboni thinks she is hallucinating. Eboni should worry about what is in her cocktail hanging with this crew.
Eboni needs to get away from all of the screaming crazy broads and heads upstairs. Leah goes up to her room. Eboni thinks that she hasn’t had connections like this with white women in one group. She thinks she can say what she wants. Eboni hasn’t been around this kind of energy since she worked on Fox News. She is going to need some time alone to re-charge after spending time with this rowdy group.
They all end up screaming it out. Luann suggests they call it a night! Phew, this was a tame episode, but next week teases there just might be some tension building in this group. They are going to need more than a healer and Reiki to exorcise this bad juju.
Next week, Ramona gets called out on the help comment and her COVID ignorance. Heather is finally showing up so we will find out how Leah chased her off the show. Be well, everyone, and see you for the Jersey finale!
HOW DO YOU THINK EBONI IS MESHING WITH THIS GROUP?
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