The lies and the hits keep on coming on this episode of Vanderpump Rules. A fun beach day takes a turn as James spirals, Schwartz loses his cool on Lala, and Sandoval… well, Sandoval does his best acting yet and manages to deflect any questions regarding Raquel.
It’s the day after Lala’s party, and Katie is checking in with the birthday girl. Katie tells Lala that she was a bit nervous about debuting her new boo, Satchel, but she realizes that she has nothing to hide or be weird about. It’s not like SHE made out with someone in the friend group like Schwartz. Katie claims that she may be able to restart a friendship with Raquel in the future, but she feels like she would have to keep one eye open around her all the time.
I mean, the rumor is now out there that Sandoval and Raquel were seen at the Abbey at 1 a.m… without anyone else there. Katie lets Lala know that she tried to blow Sandoval’s spot up with this info, but she also believes that Sandoval would never cheat on Ariana.
The Toms are lunching and catching up. Schwartz is wondering why he doesn’t have more sexual chemistry with Raquel, and the way Sandoval is trying to sell Raquel is bizarre. Schwartz shares that he believes Raquel has a crush on someone else, and that perks Sandoval up a bit, right?
As they chow down, Sandoval explains he is going on a cleanse for Ariana to help fertilize her eggs despite them having some rocky times as of late. He claims that Ariana is “at him” all the time, and it has been a bit frustrating. Schwartz agrees and says that Ariana is “quick to be dismissive.” Sandoval is clearly trying to CYA — a typical response for a cheater.
Ally tells James she is nervous after seeing Katie getting heated with Sandoval at Lala’s party. She is fearful that Katie brought up the Abbey information. Ally then tells James that Katie implied to her that Sandoval and Ariana don’t have a whole lot of rules in their relationship. James tells Ally not to talk to Ariana about this information directly, but instead, she should have a chat with Scheana because she is Ariana’s bestie.
Ariana and Katie are visiting the future home of their sandwich shop, Something About Her. They are officially lease owners, and they are being guided by the queen herself, LVP. She reminds the girls that every day is costing them money, and Ariana shares that they are getting investors to assist them (clearly they have learned from the Toms’ mistakes).
LVP asks to hear about Lala’s birthday, and Ariana spills about the Oliver drama. LVP tries to set the record straight and states that she knows for a FACT that Oliver is separated. LVP reminds the girls that Raquel has done nothing wrong in this situation, and to that, Katie scoffs that Raquel is a ho.
Later, Lala meets James, and he talks about DJing his upcoming festival, Imagine. Of course, the conversation turns to Raquel, and James tells Lala to just let Raquel be since Lala has already stated her mind. James suggests that they go to Hermosa Beach tomorrow, and by they, he means everyone… even Raquel. She is no longer James’ problem now and wants the group to just have fun.
“Hi, I’m here for my jizz results.” That would be the way Sandoval greeted the fertility receptionist. Sandoval explains that Ariana’s grandmother suddenly passed away and she couldn’t be there with him at the appointment, so he brought the next best thing: Schwartz. Sandoval receives relatively good news from the doctor, and he is told that they will touch base in about two to three months in hopes that things will turn around once Sandoval stops using drugs, drinking, and wearing tight clothes. LOL.
Ally and Scheana meet up so Ally can have *the talk* with her about Sandoval and Raquel. Ally comes out and tells Scheana that she saw Sandoval and Raquel at the Abbey at 1 a.m. and further states that Katie told her that Ariana and Sandoval have no rules in their relationship. Scheana is p*ssed off that Katie would hint they are in an open relationship, and she is frustrated that everyone is making Raquel out to be the bad guy. Scheana promises to discuss this with Sandoval, and Ally is left feeling uncomfortable as the messenger.
The beach day is underway, and the whole gang rolls up for what should be a fun day. Schwartz and James demonstrate their lack of athletic ability with a football while Charli meets Ally for the first time. Speaking of meeting for the first time, Schwartz meets Satchel for the first time. He’s a bit surprised that he would be Katie’s type, but alas, he has no say in her relationships.
Scheana pulls Sandoval aside and shares the information Ally told her the night before. Sandoval chooses instead to gaslight the world by saying the Abbey is not a great spot for a secret romantic rendezvous. Scheana further shares that Katie is spreading the rumor that Ariana and Sandoval are in an open relationship, which he vehemently denies, but this only adds to his dislike of Katie.
In the meantime, James is busy bragging about DJing at the Imagine Festival. He is talking it up, and Schwartz asks James if the festival is as big of a deal as Rachella (this is where and how James proposed to Raquel). James gets TRIGGERED by this “joke,” and we are gonna need a translator for what James is saying as he goes off on Schwartz. James’ finale is when he throws his drink in Schwartz’s face in anger.
Everyone is shocked, and James believes that because his feelings got hurt, it was a justified move. Ally is tired of James being so sensitive every time people bring up Raquel around him, and she wonders if James is truly ready to have a new serious girlfriend.
Things continue to spiral when Sandoval gets into it with Lala, who tries to stop Sandoval from defending Schwartz for hooking up with Raquel. We need a flow chart to assist us as we get reminded just how incestual this group is thanks to Sandoval losing his sh*t with Lala. We are told again that Ariana and Tom hooked up while he was with Kristen, and Kristen hooked up with James on Sandoval’s bed… using Sandoval’s condoms. So yea, this type of behavior is old news to some.
James is annoyed that Ally is not on his side, and she tells James that the way he acted was a joke. After having enough, Katie, Lala, and their men head to a bar for better vibes, but soon the rest of the group joins. Schwartz does a fantastic job of making things awkward around Satchel, and he excuses himself when Katie gives him a death stare.
Schwartz finds James and apologizes for his Rachella joke, and James just really wants to start getting taken seriously by the group. Lala sees this duo deep in a convo, and so she jumps in to remind us that she still has issues with Schwartz. But this time, Schwartzie ain’t having it. He is spicy and tells Lala, “You are the corniest human being in this entire place. Give Them Lala?” He tells Lala over and over that she is corny and a “bootleg housewife.” Lala gets in his face and points her finger at him, letting him know what she really thinks about him. During all this, Schwartz grabs a chicken wing and reminds Lala that she is a great mom; however, upon reflecting once Lala storms away, Schwartz calls her a “one-dimensional human being.”
Lala runs back to Katie, and James continues to make a fool of himself, which, according to Ally, “no one wants to watch.” Amen. Scheana stirs the pot by asking Lala about the Oliver situation again, and then it continues to spiral when Raquel begins to deal with Katie. She is not happy that Katie called her a whore, and then Sandoval jumps in to state that Ariana is not happy with Katie now. This is a sh*tshow.
Sandoval is denying anything weird occurred at the Abbey with Raquel, but WHY IS HE SMILING WHEN THE PRODUCER ASKS IF ANYTHING HAS HAPPENED BETWEEN HIM AND RAQUEL?! Poor Ally gets called over into this mess, and she tries to reiterate the conversation that initially happened between her and Katie regarding the Abbey.
Katie claims she was TRYING to say that Sandoval and Ariana don’t keep each other on leashes, but if anything WAS happening with Raquel, Ariana def doesn’t know about it. Sandoval does his favorite move and begins deflecting on Katie for her relationship with Schwartz. Sandoval claims when he makes mistakes he apologizes for his issues, but we all know now that statement will come around to haunt him…
TELL US – THOUGHTS ON THE VANDERPUMP RULES EPISODE?
