It’s the season finale of the Real Housewives of Orange County, and what a long, strange trip it has been. Friendships mended; friendships shattered. Relationships questioned… over and over and over again. And Heather is just at the center of it all. She is called calculated and controlling, bossy and stuck up, but is it Tamra turning the others against Heather? Or is it Heather fed up with the finger-pointing and lies? This is simply a game of trying to split the group into teams by pointing out the bad behaviors of the opposing team captains…
Shannon‘s clumsiness has once again taken its toll on her in Mexico, and so she pays a visit to her chiropractor, who also happens to be a total creep when he hits on Emily as she enters. After getting all their kinks worked out, Emily and Shannon sit down to discuss the issues. Emily talks about how Gina is still upset over the whole Heather situation, and things are still not okay between them.
Things might be kind of weird at Gina’s upcoming circus-themed “freak show.” While perusing costumes for the event, Gina, Jenn, and Tamra try to figure out Heather’s motives. Gina truly thought Heather was her friend, and Jenn feels like Heather is just protecting her image. According to them, Heather needs to learn how to accept accountability. Heather continues to try and CYA, and so she attempts to blame others for things she says and does, but this time, Tamra is certain that Heather cannot destroy her.
Speaking of Heather, the Dubrows have started their short-term lease in the O.C. now that their mansion has sold. Heather is still recuperating after the Mexico trip, and Terry finds it unfathomable that Gina would actually believe that Heather would call her a loser.
Gina justifies her belief that Heather is the bad guy because, after all, Tamra doesn’t lie… she admits that she said or did something and owns it. But Heather thinks she has Tamra’s number — everyone is afraid of her, and when the Alpha girl speaks to them, they listen. Heather refers to Gina and Emily as Tamra’s lap dogs, which is very clearly NOT a compliment.
Heather claims that she values her friendship with Gina, and so, when Gina texts Heather to have a sit-down conversation to work things out, Heather is up for it.
Tamra is set to be the cover star of Amare magazine for the Women of the Year issue. I have never heard of this magazine, but more power to Tamra for highlighting her successes in any way she can. Her CBD company has grown into a multi-million-dollar business, and Tamra gets emotional about how she was able to get to where she is now. She thinks that in the next two years, they will sell their CBD company and perhaps dabble in the sex toy business, mainly to help rekindle her flame in bed with Eddie. Total TMI, and TBH, I’m not sure if she is joking or serious…
The hits just keep on coming with Ryan’s outfits, and it’s nearly impossible to take him seriously as Jenn talks to him about the Mexico trip. Jenn feels like Tamra is nursing some information about Ryan that she doesn’t know, and Jenn continues to shake Ryan down for info about his cheating past. Ryan wonders why Jenn keeps listening to Tamra when they are busy “forging an amazing path.” Jenn questions if Ryan will always be *that* into her considering all the baggage she has: Five kids. No money. And yet, Mr. Splatter-Paint-Vest chooses her.
Shannon and John are heading out for a date, and based on the way they are behaving, it looks like it’s the first time they’ve ever gone out together. Shannon tells John all about Heather and how she continuously blames others for her wrongdoings. John couldn’t seem more turned off by Shannon and her eating and her lamenting over her children. John feeds Shannon what she wants to hear about mending their relationship, and it’s giving weird vibes knowing that they broke up shortly after cameras went down…
Shannon can hardly believe that she is going to be dealing with people’s sh*t, but here she is with the Sitolonic. She figures Jenn would be the greatest victim, and so she forges a plan with Tamra to have Jenn come over. They warm Jenn up by discussing their favorite topic, Heather, and we learn that Heather apparently has a fetish with Jenn’s feet. Jenn then shares how Heather used her and Taylor in Mexico — Heather came to their room after the dinner fight, said she was going to get soup, and then never returned. The nerve of Heather! Later, Jenn successfully has a bowel movement, and I guess we can thank Dr. Moon and Shannon for that.
Heather and Gina sit down to hash things out. Gina feels like she has been there for Heather, but Heather calls BS on that statement. Heather pulls up Tamra’s podcast to prove it was Tamra who called Emily and Gina losers, and Gina seems shocked. Gina is sick and tired of being used as “collateral damage” in the Heather/Tamra feud, but she is willing to make amends with her girl Heather.
Heather is over being attacked by everyone in the group, including Emily. She cannot figure out why everyone is so scared of Tamra because SHE is the one who caused all these problems. Heather is unsure if she can attend Gina’s event because she doesn’t want to be around Tamra, who has singlehandedly ruined every one of her friendships within the group.
Gina’s circus party is underway, and it is quite the scene, right down to her boyfriend, Travis, dressed as her lion. Emily is popcorn, Shane is butter (lol), Taylor is cotton candy, and Tamra is an evil clown, which is SO on brand. Jenn is the Cowardly Lion and Ryan forgot his shirt… did he think this was a Chippendales party? Shannon is dressed as a fortune teller (bet she wishes she was able to tell the future before getting that DUI…), and even Gina’s ex and his girlfriend are in attendance.
Gina explains to Emily that she is caught between her and Heather and that Emily is coming across as a lot more aggressive than usual. Emily is hurt over being called a loser, but when she hears that it was really Tamra saying that she is a loser on her podcast, Emily looks confused.
Gina is #teamHeather, but she is on an island alone, and Tamra claims Gina was “Heather-merized.” Heather enters dressed as an aerialist, or ice queen, if you ask Tamra. As she watches from afar, Tamra runs her mouth about how she thinks Heather is intimidated by the friendships within the group.
A VERY drunk Taylor attempts to explain getting stood up by Heather in Mexico to anyone with a pulse, and she goes around talking about her wealthy friends who are not nearly as pretentious as Heather. Jenn feels a bit dismissed by Heather, and so Taylor and Jenn grab Heather to talk.
This is a serious beef over chicken soup, dear readers. Heather swears when she left them to get her soup, she passed out. Taylor thinks it is something more sinister and spills how she was supposed to meet her stepdaughter, but instead waited around for Heather. Taylor slurs that she doesn’t need to chase her friends, they just show up, and Heather is seemingly grossed out by Taylor’s attack. The best part about this segment is Heather’s impersonation of a spiraling Taylor. Perhaps she should add that to her IMDb?
When Jenn sees that she will not get a word in with Taylor around, she pulls Heather aside. Heather cannot understand how Jenn continues to put up with Tamra, and Jenn states that she does blame Tamra’s behavior for Heather’s lack of interest in her.
According to Tamra, Heather is going one by one through the group, trying to rally the troops against Tamra. Emily is the next stop for Heather, and she claims that her intentions with Emily are always good, considering SHE wasn’t the one who said Emily isn’t a real attorney… Tamra did. Tamra looks on from a distance, analyzing the body language, and a drunken Taylor cackles about Heather thinking she is better than everyone. Tamra is getting infuriated watching Heather make amends and turn the tables on Tamra once again. She believes that Heather is the biggest villain of them all.
Tamra denies all wrongdoings and chases down Heather to talk about the truth. Heather responds with, “No, Tamra. You have your own version of the truth and I’m not interested in it.” Heather goes to the podcast for proof once again and tells Tamra that she doesn’t give a sh*t about her. Later the podcast segment is played in full, and Tamra clearly says the loser thing was an inside joke. Who to believe??
In the end, Jenn wants to start being more powerful and have more of a voice. She is planning when to move in with Ryan despite the hiccups highlighted over the season. Shannon and John broke up shortly after filming (or have they?), so all of that defending of their relationship during the season was for naught.
Gina is happy to have a sense of direction and is hopeful for a diamond, especially after expanding their family with a new puppy. Emily strives to be a better person — even if that means clinging to the coattails of her kid-model daughter.
Heather can’t understand Tamra’s negative motives, but she knows that her future is bright now that she is $55 million richer. Tamra is done buying Heather’s bullsh*t and promises the truth will always come out… makes you wonder if she means all truths or just the truths that make others look awful…
TELL US – THOUGHTS ON THE FINALE EPISODE OF RHOC?