Credit: Clifton Prescod/Bravo
Julia Lemigova is seeking treatment for post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
Following a series of controversies throughout the recently aired seventh season of Real Housewives of Miami, which saw Julia, 53, toss a glass of water at Guerdy Abraira, 47, and claim to have slept with Adriana de Moura, 59, Julia said that after watching the painful reunion play out, she’s committed to self-growth. She also said she’s grateful to her wife, Martina Navratilova, 68, who showed her grace amid her hardships.
“It was very emotional,” Julia told PEOPLE on October 16. “Reliving those moments is really hard, but it also made me think and self-reflect. The beauty, as hard as reality television can be, is that it can be a pathway for personal growth and self-reflection. And if you are honest with yourself and with your audience, it can actually be — believe me or not — quite a healing experience.”
“It helped me to grow as a woman, as a mother, as a wife,” she continued. “I’m still unpacking a lot. I carry a lot of guilt about it, and a lot of pain. Because it can be really hard to look at yourself in the mirror and not like the person you see. But doing that has really helped me see that I need help.”
Looking back at her darkest moments of RHOM season seven, Julia said there was “no excuse for throwing things or screaming.”
“I take full responsibility and accountability for my behavior, and I’m sorry, again, to Guerdy,” she stated, reflecting on her water toss. “There’s no one to blame for this but me. What I’ve done, it didn’t come out of nowhere — I see now that it came from years of trauma I’ve never fully faced. It bubbled up. I felt cornered emotionally, I snapped. And that’s not okay.”
According to Julia, her antics were a “cry for help.”
“What I can see so clearly now is this wasn’t just a television meltdown; it was a cry for help that played out on camera,” she shared, adding that she’s now ready to confront the challenges she’s faced in the past, including the loss of her five-month-old son, Maximilien Stern, who died from shaken baby syndrome in 2000 while in the care of a nanny.
“Sometimes when bad things happen to you, whether in childhood or later in life, it paralyzes you and you just want to run away,” Julia explained. “I’ve been the queen of sweeping things under the rug. I’d always tell myself, ‘I’ll deal with it tomorrow.’ But I see now, that comes back to bite you in the end. And I need to work on myself. I want to do better — not just for me, but for my family.”
Following the conclusion of the three-part RHOM reunion, Julia is seeking the help of professionals.
“I’m seeking treatment for my PTSD, because I need to finally deal with things I’ve buried for years,” she explained. “This is deep work, and I can’t do it alone. I may be a strong woman, but I’m not Wonder Woman. I’m human.”
As Julia hopes to grow personally, her wife, Martina, has been a source of strength.
“Martina showed me a lot of grace when navigating this privately. She’s met my honesty and vulnerability with a lot of love. I’m so grateful to her,” Julia gushed.
As she looks ahead to becoming a better version of herself, Julia reminded viewers that English isn’t her first language.
“I speak five, and sometimes my words don’t come across clearly. So I understand why a lot of people are confused by what I say and how I act,” she noted. “But I’m trying my best. And I’m doing the work to get better.”
“What defines us isn’t our mistakes, it’s how we learn from them and move forward, and that’s the journey I’m on,” she concluded.