It’s here: the season finale of the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Don’t worry, guys. You can bet on a repeat of this season’s drama, beef, and unnecessary bickering. There’s always something when it comes to these ladies.
As Dorit previews the venue of her Beverly Beach fashion show, she shrieks around and gasps over her 19 foot palm trees, cuz priorities. Dorit claims she was “synonymous with being a business woman” (insert record screech here…wait, a business woman? In what lifetime?). Needless to say, she is pleased and nervous and excited for this collection to be shown.
All of the women (+ some of their husbands…only the smart ones, really. I mean, what guy would miss out on a swimsuit fashion show?!) head on over to show their support for Dorit. Rinna states she can “totally relate to the whole fashion” thing. #QVC. Maybe it’s time she has a serious convo with Teddi about her lack of the “whole fashion” thing. Why does Teddi look like a 1990’s figure skater? But I digress.
At the event, everyone mingles before the show begins. Camille shows off her honker of an engagement ring and she deserves that beauty after being with Kelsey Grammar. Gag. The men talk. The women gossip. And of course, bring up the past because that’s what they do best. Take Kyle bringing up panty gate…that thing that was soooo last season. Kyle does not “appreciate” how Dorit is trying to create a problem between other women throughout the group, but doesn’t have a chance to speak her mind just yet.
PK grabs a mic and invites everyone to direct their attention to the curtain. “PK and Dorit love a curtain.” Seems to be one at nearly every event those people throw. The curtain reveals a runway and the models pick their wedgies one last time before strutting their stuff down the cat walk. The women ooo and ahhh over the collection and it is quite impressive coming from Dorit considering this is the same woman who fakes an accent.
Post fashion show, Rinna and Erika seek Dorit out to compliment her on a job well done. Dorit thanks everyone for coming to support her and all the women gather on sofas to obviously prep for the newest drama to be had. Leave it to Kyle to ruin a relatively pleasant evening. She asks LVP when the issue of Beverly Hills Lifestyle magazine with Dorit on the cover comes out and LVP has to shamefully explain, “Well…we’re kinda not doing the photo shoot” with Dorit for the issue. Uh-oh. Dorit states, “It’s a bit sh*tty that Lisa took me out of the magazine and didn’t even tell me.”
And now we sit back and watch this train wreck begin. Dorit demands to know any of Kyle’s unresolved feelings, right there…at her “HUGE” fashion show. Like, lady…don’t you have to go rub elbows with your guests? The press? Stop giving this Beverly Hills Lifestyle thing life. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I thought Kyle wanted to “get past” this BS??
Kyle is legit stomping all over Dorit’s big day and is fired up. All Kyle wants is for Erika to speak up and squash this panty stuff. WHY ARE WE STILL TALKING ABOUT THIS?! Kyle storms away for …no apparent reason…?? And is so triggered by all of this that she runs into the arms of Dorit’s husband. Like, give these people a chance to celebrate their success. Kyle believes that everyone is “full of sh*t”…except Teddi. Teddi realizes what Kyle tried to explain to Erika. Sometimes silence speaks volumes.
The next day, HarryHamlin (one word) and Rinna FaceTime with Delilah, their model daughter. It is great to see Delilah successfully adulting, considering her anxiety ridden past. Must be nice to be a gazillionaire and have a celebrity hairdresser come to your HOUSE to cut your HAIR. It’s really just a chance for HarryHamlin and Rinna to brag about their children and talk about the dramatics within the housewife circle. Rinna claims she is the peacemaker this season and states, “Just call me Yoda.”
Meanwhile, Teddi and Kyle meet to exercise and talk business…and by business, I mean the drama at the fashion show. Teddi believes that “everyone needs to stop kissing everyone’s a*s and be honest.” I like this Kyle/Teddi friendship a lot because Teddi holds Kyle ACCOUNTABLE for her actions (see what I did there?), but also makes her do squats whilst complaining. Two birds. One stone.
LVP is my hero….she drinks rose in the afternoon, saves rescue dogs, and tries her best to rise above the drama…unlike Kyle. Kyle, on the other hand, IS drama. She insisted on having the ladies over to see her new home and have a viewing party of “American Woman,” the TV show she produced. All of the ladies are there, including Dorit. “Even though Kyle ruined yet another night for me,” she still wants to support Kyle. Kyle makes a half a*s apology to Dorit and naturally, Dorit is not entirely sure she is able to move on. Ugh. Kyle then gives the women a tour of her beautiful new home and it truly is extravagant. I wish more of it was decorated, but then again, a viewing party stops for no one.
Bring on “American Woman,” Kyle’s TV Land baby. I’m still amazed those women stayed quiet for a whole 22 minutes as they previewed the show. Kyle then shares her trepidation about how her sisters’ may feel about the show, since many of the storylines are paralleled to Kyle’s life growing up. Nonetheless, the women toast successes and reflect on the season.
Kyle: “This year is all about changes.” New house burglarized? How terrible! Didn’t Mauricio talk to Teddi’s husband about security at Dorit’s fashion show? Foreshadowing much?
Dorit: “It’s never too late to get back in the game and do what you love.” It’s unclear if Dorit is talking about causing drama or designing swimsuits, but either way, she was definitely victorious.
Rinna: “I react to injustices…but it’s not my job to confront it.” I really hope that Rinna gets a bit more involved next season. I missed her big fat lips blabbing everyone’s secrets. Sigh.
Erika: “When you start to say yes, life starts to open.” Erika’s motto is say yes. Because one day, no one’s gonna ask. And her husband may no longer shell over the dough to make it all happen.
Teddi: “I’m authentically me, whether people like it or not.” The only thing that would make this finale better is if Teddi rode off on her horse. Cuz she loves them, remember?
LVP: “Every relationship is different.” The dog whisperer has hit the nail on the head with this group of women. Although this season sort of felt like Groundhog Day, and although these women drove each other batty bickering over silly issues, one thing is clear: there will be blood at the reunion.
Photo by: Nicole Weingart/Bravo
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