Vanderpump Rules Recap: Lala Tells Raquel Her Self-Worth Comes From a Man’s Approval, Katie and James Freak Over Tom & Raquel’s Kiss

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Vanderpump Rules Recap: Lala Tells Raquel Her Self-Worth Comes From Man’s Approval, Katie and James Freak Over Tom & Raquel’s Kiss

On this episode of Vanderpump Rules, it’s all happening… again. Scheana‘s wedding is finally here, but it might be overshadowed by the kiss heard ’round the world. Schwartz is in for some serious backlash after his make-out sesh with Raquel.  Will this group behave long enough to let Scheana and Brock say “I do?”

He did it. Schwartz made out with Raquel. The hecklers in the background make it as real as can be.  After pulling away from the world’s most un-romantic kiss, Raquel suggests, “I feel like we should go somewhere private.” They proceed to suck face further and Raquel explains that she feels “giddy.” Schwartz claims that it feels illegal to be making out with Raquel, and he immediately regrets the kiss when he wonders what Katie will think.

Meanwhile, Scheana phones Lala and calls her out for being with the “others” during her wedding festivities.  Knowing damn well that Lala was with Katie, Scheana abruptly changes the subject and asks, “Did you see Schwartz and Raquel make out?” Way to stir the pot, Shea-Schu. James, who followed Katie, Lala, and Kristina back, is about to flip his lid, and Katie feels gut-punched to learn that people were cheering on Schwartz and Raquel.

After Scheana does some digging, she calls Lala back to confirm that yes, in fact, the duo did make out. Brock explains that people were cheering because they wanted to see Schwartz happy, and to that, Lala calls Raquel a “swamp creature.” Katie hates Tom more than Raquel at this moment, and a jealous James gets nasty about how much Schwartz wants to f*ck Raquel, all while in the presence of his *current* girlfriend, Ally.  It just screams that James has not quite moved on yet, despite jumping back into a relationship.

As the Scheana parties goes on, the guests get drunker. There’s Sandoval weirdly repeating “Raquel, Raquel, Raquel,” and when Ariana hears that Schwartz and Raquel made out, she is aghast. To make the party more fun, skinny dipping ensues, and the juxtaposition between that scene and Katie’s crew consoling Katie is wild.  Katie cannot fathom why and how Schwartz could do this with Raquel after being with her for 12 years. She feels as though it was just a mean move, and I have to agree…

The next day, Scheana, her sister, Ariana, and Raquel roll up to the spa to be pampered. Scheana talks about her disappointment in Lala. Scheana does not appreciate Lala splitting her time with Katie and Kristina, and she wonders if Lala will even attend her wedding after her antics!

Because she is still on cloud 9, Raquel suggests she walk down the aisle with groomsman Schwartz and even FaceTimes him to make it official.  It is such an awkward exchange and Ariana grimaces while Raquel continues to star in her own personal rom-com.

A needy Schwartz plops down by Ally and James as they relax by the pool. He knows he is on thin ice with James because he made out with Raquel, but he tries to smooth things over by saying, “Me and Raquel don’t have a thing.” He then goes on about how he wanted to “stick it to the man” by making out with Raquel to temporarily make himself happy. Schwartz thought the kiss would snap him out of his funk, and James gets p*ssed when Schwartz puts his hand on his leg. James makes it clear that he is not ok with him sticking his tongue down his ex-fiancée’s mouth… and he simultaneously makes it clear that he is not over Raquel, as well.

Back at Villa Rossa, LVP meets with Greg, the owner of Schwartz and Sandy’s. LVP was thrilled that Greg was happy to meet with her to discuss the Toms’ current situation. Greg makes it clear that the restaurant is nowhere near opening and that the Toms have not listened to a single piece of advice he has offered to them. Greg refuses to promise he can open by the 31st just to appease LVP, and I think she is shocked someone actually told her no.

Back in Mexico, Schwartz decides to wake Sandoval up with some Pina Coladas in bed. When LVP phones them, she puts them in check. She tells them right away how the meeting went with Greg, but the Toms are irked that she is questioning their business and their strategies (if you can call them that).

Lala pays a visit to Scheana’s room and reports that she will not be attending the dinner later that evening.  Lala states that her life is intense, and she wants to be around women that build her up — not people like Raquel.  Lala feels like Raquel is insecure and she is triggered by her because of how she is behaving. Lala then tells Scheana that although her wedding is the most important thing in Scheana’s life right now, other people have other things going on. Ouch.

Scheana’s hibachi dinner is off to a great start, especially when Raquel gets seated in between the Toms. Nice. When James calls Raquel out for hooking up with dudes in the friend group, she responds that she is “trying to live a little.” James reminds Raquel that he doesn’t think he was ever in love with her, and at that point, Ally removes herself from hibachi to go say hi to Kristina, Lala, and Katie, who were prepping to leave the grounds for a girls’ dinner.

Right before the ladies head out, Schwartz (“the sweaty pig” in Katie’s words), comes dangerously close to breathing the same air as Katie.  The crew legit books it, with James and Ally now in tow, and they find themselves safely in a cave restaurant, far away from the resort. When the topic of Raquel and Schwartz comes up, Katie comes right out and says, “I want to light them both on f*cking fire.” She is not mincing any words.

Later, we find out that Scheana and Brock have been technically married for a year already. Ariana explains that the wedding is the icing on the cake and that the marriage is what really counts. We also find out that Raquel no longer wants to walk down the aisle with Schwartz since he’s not a good “walker.” Eyeroll.

It’s Scheana and Brock’s wedding day! Scheana can hardly believe the differences between this wedding and her last one because she just feels so happy to be doing this with Brock. Katie and Kristina’s balcony overlooks the wedding, and this time around, when Katie sneaks a look, she calls the wedding beautiful, because it truly is. Scheana is beaming, and even though Brock can’t hang a TV in seven minutes (hey, Rob!), she knows Brock is her person.

Schwartz lets Raquel know that he got in big, big trouble about the kiss and he talks about what a “calamity” it has turned into. They joke about the kiss, and Schwartz plays it off with a few high fives and awkward dance moves. Speaking of awkward dance moves, during the first dance, Brock rips Scheana’s skirt off and lifts her ala Dirty Dancing, making this something to remember for sure.

While at their last vaca dinner, Katie lets Kristina know that if she knew how this trip was going to go, she would not have come. Just as they get their sushi, Schwartz pops in and pops a piece of sushi in his mouth. RUDE. He wonders why it matters what he did with Raquel, considering he’s been divorced from Katie for seven months. Schwartz claims he did not realize anyone was watching him make out with Raquel, and Katie tells him that she never had hatred towards him, but now she does. She lets him know that he “nuked” the bridge between them and Schwartz says he doesn’t care anymore. In fact, he feels more divorced now.  Schwartz now realizes that he needs a “nice, healthy break from Katie.”

At the reception, Raquel comes to talk to Lala and apologizes for calling her a mistress bobo. Raquel felt like the girls were laughing AT her during the Vegas trip and felt like she was being attacked by the group. She suggests that Lala and company take up a hobby, and to that, Lala suggests Raquel go and find herself elsewhere. Lala’s conversation with Raquel goes nowhere, except maybe more south…

As the evening wears on, Wine Katie realizes after seeing some wedding pics that the same pastor that married Scheana and Shay also married Scheana and Brock (how interesting). Katie explains that after this trip, her healing process about the divorce has sped up a bit more and she is finally ready to be more open about who she has been seeing. Katie talks about being a puma around her 25-year-old boy toy and she doesn’t care anymore about Schwartz and his feelings. Is this war?