Erin has chosen to turn a blind eye to the vow (can I say renewal because she never actually said them at their wedding in the first place) curse, and on this episode of the Real Housewives of New York City, she is throwing a grand event to celebrate 10 years of marriage. A bored Brynn oversteps when she starts hitting on Erin’s husband, and Sai leaves without saying goodbye to Erin. Needless to say, Erin is displeased…
Ubah is THE friend to have. She has invited Erin to her old friend Jacob Arabo, the jeweler to the one percent… the rich and the famous. Ubah understands that Erin obviously needs to have something borrowed for her anniversary party, and so she has arranged for Erin to be dripping at the event. Erin tries on $224,000 earrings and plays dress up in diamonds.
Brynn and Jessel are also planning for Erin’s anniversary party, but they’re focusing on their outfits. We hear again that Brynn has been engaged three times because “it’s easier to say yes,” and her dating history makes it hard to believe she is ready to settle down. Jessel starts to analyze Erin’s party invite, and she giggles over the sponsors, and Brynn likens the lengthy list at the bottom of the invite to a Coachella poster.
In the meantime, Erin claims that she is good with Jessel, minus the fact that she insinuated Erin doesn’t support women. Jessel’s generalized apology to Erin is not the best route, but Jessel feels like Erin is the common denominator since she’s had a problem with almost everyone in the group.
Over at Jenna’s place, she explains that since leaving J.Crew, she has had a chance to do more things… like renovating Brownstones and doing interior design. Besides that, she also has started a line of false eyelashes, which her client/friend advertises while on a Zoom call with Jenna. Jenna is a jack of all trades, really.
Erin meets up with Abe, the Babe, her husband of 10 years. They’re celebrating their anniversary and are back on the Upper East Side for old-time’s sake. They discuss the upcoming party, and it seems like it’s a pretty big deal between the speeches, and of course, telling their vows. They got married after nine months of dating, and Erin was married at 25 years old. When the waitress asks Abe if he would like a big rock with his drink, Erin jokes *she* wants a big rock. On cue, Abe whips out a massive diamond ring, which Abe describes as “pricey,” but he states that Erin deserves it.
While on the topic of pricey… Jessel is obsessing about preschool applications for her twins. Jessel is freaking out about the process while her husband, Pavit, calmly tries to get her to chill out. Jessel is more interested in the schools because of the high-profile clientele, but when Pavit sees the $62,000 price tag, he cares less about who goes there and more about his bank account.
Sai’s husband, David, does a good job reminding us all that Jessel might be overwhelmed, considering she has twins and is going back to work. In other words, Jessel could use less of the ladies attacking her and more support. David scoffs at the fact that Sai is not the most empathetic friend in the group, yet they all seem to come to her looking for a shoulder to lean on.
It’s the day of Erin and Abe’s anniversary party, and everyone is preparing in their own way. Erin claims she is excited that Jessel will be joining the party because she is ready to have some fun with her after all that drama. Ubah calls Erin with some bad news… she has COVID. What a shame that the lady who supplied Erin with the borrowed jewels can’t even be a part of the event.
The event must go on… and on it does. The old bank venue has been transformed into practically a wedding. Erin has a bodyguard for the evening while she dons millions of dollars worth of (borrowed) diamonds, and she is more than okay with that.
Brynn rolls up, already eyeing men and bouncing around the room. She wants to hit on Erin’s dad, or Erin’s brother… basically if the man has a pulse, she is pouncing. Jessel is happy for a night out, and although she will complain about her kids, she makes it clear she is not “done” because she needs her girl.
After many failed attempts of grabbing Erin’s a*s as a greeting, Erin finally turns around to say hi to Jenna. Sai comes solo because the babysitter is sick (and her husband did not want to come if that meant he had to wear something other than a tracksuit, plus he probably heard Erin doesn’t feed her guests so…).
Brynn is getting bored, so she starts looking for trouble. You know the old saying: If you look for trouble, you’re gonna find it. Brynn makes herself waaaay too comfy chatting with Abe. She even goes as far as telling Abe that when he divorces Erin, she is available. She lets the people know she is interested in Erin’s dad (and his checkbook), and she looks forward to having Erin call her “mom” when she dates her dad.
WAIT — a cameo by Meredith and Brooks Marks?! Who needs BravoCon when you have Erin’s 10-year anniversary party, amiright?!
Jenna lets Sai and Jessel know that she is single, and it has been hard on her, especially after dating this person for almost a year and a half. Sai and Jessel do their best to help Jenna through it, but they try to pry more info out of her. Jenna dances around the fact this person didn’t want to be in the spotlight, and that being on RHONY probably was the final straw. In an attempt to try and make Jenna feel better, Jessel blurts out, “Would you like to have a threesome with me and my husband?” Um, what?!
The speeches commence and they rattle on and on. Of course, Brynn finds this mind-numbing (me too), and Sai suggests they go to Nobu since there is no food to be seen at the party. As the ladies chit-chat during the never-ending speeches, Erin’s sister makes her way over to the cackling hags (lol) and suggests they quiet down. Perhaps she should be telling the speakers to stop talking, but I digress…
Erin FINALLY gets the chance to say her vows, and I’m sorry, but no one wants to hear this. Erin goes as far as shushing the crowd when the chatter becomes too much. Finally, after much ado and sexual references per Abe’s speech, the ladies are finally able to get onto the dance floor… but there’s no food and Sai has decided to Irish Exit to Nobu. She bounces and misses Erin’s second dress reveal, and so of course, Erin is p*ssed. Erin cannot get over that Sai didn’t say goodbye to her, especially because Sai called Jenna rude for doing the same thing at Erin’s house. Something tells me quite a few people are now on Erin’s sh*t list after this party…
TELL US – THOUGHTS ON THE RHONY?