Summer House Recap: The Exes are Coming

by Julia Comments
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summer house recap mama drama

Saturday at the Hamptons. The moms are still at the Summer House, the drinks are still flowing, and Stephen is still annoying.

Screaming for attention, Stephen decides to play a game called “Mama Drama,” which, according to him, is similar to the newlywed game. Except the questions are incredibly uncomfortable, particularly the question asking about the number of sexual partners. I am squirming on the sofa and experiencing second hand embarrassment as the questions make more of the housemates blush and reevaluate their lives.

The night continues once the moms and family members exit. Someone really needs to take the bull horn away from Stephen. Everyone but Kyle and Amanda go out for the night. Kyle’s mom and Amanda’s mom share a bed, which means Kyle and Amanda are stuck on a blow up mattress. I am impressed by their selflessness. Two thumbs up.

The next morning, Kyle and his mother lounge by the pool and discuss a particular “Mama Drama” question…ya know…the marriage one. Kyle doesn’t seem very apt to marriage any time soon…which could be problematic considering Amanda essentially has a venue booked, a dress on order, and a dj rearing to go. I kid. Kinda.

“Last time I was at the house I wasn’t even sure if I wanted to come back here,” but alas, she is back. Danielle. Phantom roommate. Everyone fakes a hello to her and not surprisingly, her first question is….where’s Carl? Lauren explains that now that “Carl is out of the picture,” it’s gonna be a fresh start for her and Danielle. A “Carl-free Lauren” is exactly what Danielle was hoping for, as evidently, the fun can really start now. I wish it was more of a “Carl-free Summer.” Seems like I am not the only one crossing my fingers to give that guy the boot.

Later, getting to the beach seems so exhausting. The packing. The drive. The walk down to the water. Why aren’t these guys just sticking to the pool? I get the change of scenery deal, the “Sunday Serenity,” but is it really worth it? As the gang reflects on the family-filled weekend, we learn just a little more about Stephen’s parents. They do not accept him and their relationship is very surface, just like this segment at the beach.

Before we know it, everyone’s back in the city, “working.” We are treated to seeing them attend “business meetings,” coffee breaks, and therapy sessions. We are talking about you, Lindsay! During the therapy session, Lindsay shares that her ex, Everett, will be at the house this weekend. He is a dear friend of Kyle’s, the 35 year old birthday boy, and Lindsay is experiencing some trepidation about her reaction to seeing Everett. Basically, her therapist tries to tell Lindsay to be in control of the entire situation…but that doesn’t seem likely.

Is it me, or does their work-week seem to fly by? Kyle is at a family reunion, so therefore, Amanda tags along for the ride with Danielle and Carl. Amanda thinks that Kyle needs to start growing up, but considering that he’s on a Bravo reality show, it doesn’t seem likely that will happen any time soon…at least not during this season. #ratings.

Almost everyone has arrived for another drama-filled weekend. Suddenly, Lindsay shares that she feels bad for Carl because he has “no allies in the house.” Carl is attempting to be a “better version of himself” and is starting by not going out for the night and clearing the air with Lauren. Carl lets Lauren know that he feels bad about lying to her, but it’s too little too late. Lauren FLIPS out on him and uses this as the perfect time to bash him and all that he stands for. Seems to me that someone isn’t over Carl…Carl claims he has “no idea how much he has hurt Lauren,” but I think he knows exactly what he’s doing.

Lindsay shares her anxiety with the girls about Everett coming to Kyle’s party. Lindsay explains that she “has been TRYING” to have a fun, single summer, but to be honest, she is freaking out on the inside. Speaking of freaking out, Lauren fills her twin in on her Carl freak-out.

Later, the ladies of the house + Stephen get absolutely “turnt” and rage hard. They are hurting the next day. According to Kyle, “People are operating around a two” and you can tell Kyle is kinda annoyed cuz it’s his BIRTHDAY WEEKEND. They all try to rally (and forget about Everett) as they prep for the white party. #sohamptons Meanwhile, Stephen heads out for a blind date. The conversation is awkward and it doesn’t seem like this is going very well. Someone save him, please. He starts over sharing about his housemates and how he wishes they could understand him on a deeper level. Stephen (shockingly) is into the guy and invites him to Kyle’s party tomorrow. Of course his date will come cuz #tvtime.

Over at the white party dinner, Carl joins post 5k and Danielle just so happens to share at that very moment that her DJ boo will be coming shortly. It’s all about timing. DJ Kevin obviously comes back to the house, soooo take that Carl. Boom.

The next morning, Lauren’s other half, Ashley, heads out for an early flight back to Cali. She sadly cannot attend Kyle’s bday celebration. I would fly out, too, considering that everyone is forced to don “British soldier” costumes. But………why? The theme of this “anti-growing up” rager is totally past me, and I am guessing that Stephen is decked as the queen, which suits him perfectly. He even gets a royal entrance. The bullhorn is getting passed around like crazy and according to Kyle, this is his “crowning achievement.” I don’t think anyone really knows what’s happening………………..particularly once Everett makes his grand appearance. Jesus, take the wheel.