Ariana Madix revealed ex-boyfriend Tom Sandoval used the name of her late father to cover up his months-long affair with Rachel “Raquel” Leviss in her new cocktail book, Single AF Cocktails: Drinks for Bad B*tches, which hits shelves on Tuesday, December 5.
Ahead of the book’s release, a series of excerpts from the publication have been released, which chronicle the moments that followed the reveal of Sandoval and Raquel’s secret romance through cocktails, as the Vanderpump Rules cast member also spoke about Sandoval’s double life and how her new boyfriend, Daniel Wai, gives her hope for the future.
“In a lot of ways it feels like I don’t have ownership over my own story anymore … [But] it’s mine, and I’m living it,” Ariana declared to PEOPLE on December 1.
In her book, while describing the “Jamie: A Dirty as Hell Martini,” Ariana said the drink is “as dirty as it gets, perfect for when you’re feeling the briny muck of your breakup.”
Ariana then detailed the “new lows” Sandoval reached in his attempts to keep his affair with Raquel hidden from her — and the public.
“Throughout the affair, he did a lot of sh*t to me that was dirty as hell, but some things really felt like new lows. He had told me time and time again that he wasn’t trying to hide anything from me whenever I would aks about little things here and there. But it turns out he was taking many steps to cover the whole thing up,” she shared. “He was so committed to this double life that he used ‘Jamie’ as a code name for her in his phone.”
“The worst part is that my dad’s name was James, may he rest in peace,” she continued. “Imagine seeing a screenshot of a text in which he tells a friend how he ‘took Jamie to the mile high club.’ For him to use my dad’s name for her was a level of disrespect I didn’t realize was possible.”
While reflecting on her heartbreak wasn’t easy for Ariana to do, she described the experience as therapeutic.
“As much as it is difficult to put yourself in a vulnerable situation, I’ve always found that something that is really scary is always, ultimately, the way to go,” she told PEOPLE. “There’s a lot of people who, for nine years, thought that I couldn’t do anything on my own, and so I love proving those people wrong … I think [Sandoval] was one of them.”
As for her new man, Daniel, who she began dating in April, shortly after her split from Sandoval, Ariana dedicated her “Oaxacan Flame” cocktail to him.
“[Daniel’s willingness to] know the real me gave me the biggest feeling of hope for my future,” she gushed.
Vanderpump Rules season 11 premieres next month on Bravo.