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Ciara Miller is opening up about the shocking betrayal of Amanda Batula and West Wilson.
In her first post-romance reveal interview, the 30-year-old Summer House star has confirmed that she and West, 31, were “working on [their] relationship” before he went public with Amanda, 34, called out Amanda for completely disregarding her after years of friendship, and explained her mindset going into the reunion taping, which is set to film later this month,
“It’s one thing to experience hurt behind closed doors,” Ciara told Glamour. “To experience it so publicly is like another layer, and then to have to see what you thought was your life still play out in season 10. It’s a major mindf*ck … [But what’s done in the dark always comes to light. And sometimes you really don’t even have to do anything except sit back and let the universe handle it all.”
According to Ciara, she and West were actively trying to mend their relationship when the news broke.
“West and I were working on our relationship. Because we are exes, sometimes you spin the block; sometimes you land in situations where you guys are out. I feel like there’s room to do that if that’s your ex,” she explained.
In fact, when Ciara celebrated her 30th birthday at the end of last year, West was present while Amanda sat out.
“We were trying to move in a more positive direction since we hadn’t spoken to each other in two years. I felt like we were actually starting to be friends again. And we had had a lot of conversations about, ‘Okay, what do I need from you? What do you need from me? What are some of the boundaries that we want to keep in place? What’s going to make our friendship a lot easier?'” she revealed. “One of those [boundaries] was no more sleeping with people on Bravo. Obviously, now that’s out the window.”
While Ciara said that she and West were “genuine friends,” she admitted to feeling more betrayed by Amanda.
“At the end of the day, a guy’s a guy. Whether or not West and I are working on a relationship, you just can’t put anything past a man. But I just never would think that it would come from someone like Amanda, who has been what has felt like in my circle and in my corner for so long. I think that’s the craziest part,” Ciara noted. “I’ve fought with your own husband [Kyle Cooke] to advocate for you. I have championed you. I have tried to be there in different ways for you and help you and get you to see your value in yourself. And so to be disregarded in such a disrespectful way is…. Honestly, it’s…. I’m at a loss for words sometimes.”
Though some have suspected Amanda was jealous of Ciara, Ciara wasn’t so sure.
“Jealousy is such a weird concept to me. I honestly don’t know. I don’t know. That’s a question for her,” she stated.
As she looked ahead to the coming weeks, Ciara said she was “just trying to make it to the reunion.”
“Every day changes. It’s like a weird flow of what you thought the past couple of years of your life looked like, and what you thought relationships were versus what they actually are. It’s tricky. One of my friends was like, ‘You’re going to shed a lot of friends] in your 30s, but that’s to gain more clarity.’ And damn, she was right,” Ciara shared.
Describing reunions as “mental warfare,” Ciara said she was a “bit nervous” as she revealed who she wanted close.
“I would love to sit next to [Mia Calabrese] or [Lindsay Hubbard] or [Carl Radke] or [KJ Dillard]. But at the same time, I’m not really thinking too much about the seating arrangement because I know that this is a moment for me to stand my own ground wherever I’m sitting,” she reasoned.
As for what she’ll wear, Ciara said trying to figure that out had been “stressful.”
“I think what I pick out is going to be a statement of where I stand … [I] don’t really think about a revenge look. I just think about what’s a proper representation of who I am right now,” she explained.
Ciara also noted that her last conversation with Amanda was “minimal.”
“Because that’s something I will talk about at the reunion,” she teased.
Summer House season 10 airs Tuesdays at 8/7c on Bravo.