Wine + Mixologists + Heartache + PJs. On this episode of Vanderpump Rules, relationships are tested and priorities of some cast members leave us scratching our heads…
The episode ended with LaLa Kent’s shocking reveal that she had broken up with her then boyfriend, Randall Emmett. The reason? Evidently, while LaLa was sober in Solvang, Randall was partying HARD. LaLa said no to all of the wine while on her girls’ trip because of a pact she made with her boo about not drinking meanwhile, her man was hitting the bottle.
Through tears, LaLa tells Katie and Brittany that she has taken a break from Randall …and the girls show her support. You know they are secretly thinking “omg, we are never getting on a PJ again.” Never fear, ya’ll. LaLa had an epitome whilst chatting with her girls. “Guess what honey? There’s a lot of d*ck I can suck to get on a PJ,” said Lala. #Priorities. #Feminism. #WellLalasVersionofFeminism
LaLa also notes that Randall took back possession of her ‘Gucci slides’ after she asked to end things. Petty much?!
“He kept my Gucci slides. Took them from me and was like, ‘I want you to remember,'” said Lala. “You want my f**king Gucci slides? Take them. Take them! Don’t f**king play me. And obviously, with my financial situation, I know I can afford my rent, which he was paying, but I can afford it on my own.”
But let’s rewind all the way back to the beginning of the episode, as back in Solvang, the girls are still asleep at 10:32 am…like adults. Slowly, the gang comes alive and Kristen awkwardly hugs Katie. Katie, the new “mom” of the group, tells Kristen that her behavior is inappropriate. Katie’s trying to get to the bottom of Kristen’s crazy meltdown because she doesn’t quite understand why JAMES would be causing Kristen to conduct herself like a drunken lunatic.
Meanwhile, at 12:05 pm…like adults, the fellas are asking the sun to stop being so loud due to their massive hangovers from the night before. They are driving the struggle bus, but Jax is still with it enough to be “remorseful” for having other girls crash their party. Somehow, he doesn’t seem genuine when he voices concerns to Schwartzie. I don’t know if I can trust anything that comes out of his mouth.
Somehow, the girls manage to pull themselves together enough to head out for *more* drinking..cuz they need it. It’s the final day in Solvang, thank GOD, and LaLa is still sticking with her “no drinking” promise to her boyfriend, Randall. She is having a hard time staying sober, but luckily Brittany is too hung to imbibe today, too.
Stassi and Kristen wind up alone to chat about Kristen’s upset-ness. Stassi understands that her friend’s behavior stems from her relationship with her boyfriend, Carter. Things haven’t been great between Kristen and Carter and so Stassi states,“Kristen you don’t need to be screamed at every day and you don’t need to be screamed at ever.” Woah, who is Stassi? She is all like, you deserve a better relationship. Kristen feels like she is always defending her relationship because Carter acts more like Kristen’s “teenage son.” Yikes.
Over at TomTom, Tom and…you guessed it, Tom, meet up with LVP to talk “business.” Lisa shares with the boys that she will be bringing in a mixologist to “train” and refine the cocktail list to make it the best it can be. Naturally, Sandoval gets salty about this whole idea because HE has WORKED to create THE cocktails for the restaurant. LVP shoots him down and explains what business is truly about, but I doubt that Sandoval is actually listening as he wallows in his misery.
LaLa shares with Stassi that she’s in a “big funk” right now and then LaLa becomes emotional talking about her father. She explains that she is mad that her father passed and because of that, she is taking her emotions out on her boyfriend, Randall. LaLa tells Stassi that Randall called LaLa’s dad before passing and asked for her hand in marriage, which is incredibly touching and sweet. It’s different to see LaLa so vulnerable.
The boys’ stay-ca is kiiiiiiiind of still going despite the fact that everyone is hungover. Sandoval wound up about the impending meeting with the mixologist at TomTom, he shares his concerns about the potential fate of his beloved cocktails. A very jelly Jax does a lovely job of stirring up the pot- the one thing he is good at. He tells Tom and Tom that if they aren’t in charge of the cocktails, then what’s the point? What good are they to the restaurant? Sandoval becomes so passionate discussing his drinks that in the heat of the moment he says, “If our drinks don’t end up on the menu, dude, I don’t know if I can be a part of it.” Schwartzie becomes mute, as he is terrified Sandoval will actually back out of the whole deal.
Back on the PJ, Stassi rocks her PJs and just like that, the ladies are back to “reality” working at SUR. Ah, it was good while it lasted.
Finally! A James appearance this episode! LVP has hired James (the kid she has fired multiple times) to DJ at the Equality California event for her. James is like a cat with 9 lives and tells the same old tale to LVP about his sobriety. He also uses the small window of time to ask about getting his See You Next Tuesday party back. LVP shuts that down immediately and tells James that it doesn’t really matter that “everyone” wants him back. Lisa is annoyed that James is simply concerned with getting his job back, but hasn’t repented for his behavior.
Stassi needs some “hangover f*cking love.” I don’t know about you, but Stassi looks great for being a “mess.” Beau and Stassi talk about the guys’ stay-cation and they seem happy in love. Another happy in love couple (at least for this season) is Schwartzie and Katie. It’s cute to watch Katie try to pump her man up for the big day: the mixologist meet-up. Schwartzie tells Katie that Sandoval has threatened to back out of TomTom if none of their drinks make it on the menu. Despite his nerves, Schwartzie feels ready to take on the mixologist.
Stassi and Beau make their way to a BBQ at Kristina Kelly’s house. Kristina is a dear old friend of Stassi’s and an OG Vanderpump Rules chick. The normal suspects make their way to the backyard bash and then Kristen storms in, leaving her boyfriend Carter in the dust. Stassi’s words have cut Kristen, but she knows that her problems with Carter are bigger than simple observations made by friends. I’m assuming
Kristen is drunk when she demands to have Carter come with her inside to talk…because THIS is the proper venue to vent frustrations with your boyfriend. Carter tries to tell his side of the story and he tells Kristen “You have a lot of bad days.” Touché! I am not sure if Kristen is capable of listening OR keeping a healthy, legitimate relationship with another human being. On one hand, I completely understand how frustrating it must be to be Carter’s sugar daddy, but on the other hand, I feel kinda bad for the guy, being stuck with Kristen and all…
LaLa decides that today’s the day: she’s gonna have a little “vino” today. This is confusing, as she JUST got home from a trip to a winery and chooses Kristina Kelly’s BBQ to snap her sobriety streak. Hmmm…something’s up.
OMG. Did anyone catch the mixologist’s last name? As if SLY isn’t cool enough, her last name is COSMOPOULOS. Is this real life? Schwartzie and Sandoval roll up with their ice and coolers and they look like amateurs next to Sly. Sly is schooling the Toms and the guys are totally sweating. Luckily, Sly shares that ten of the drinks the Toms created should make the cut and be added to the menu. The boys are ecstatic and relieved- all is good in TomTom land.
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